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Tuesday, April 21, 2015

This blog post has no title, because there is no title to this blog post.
Sometimes, it so incredibly hard to write a blog post.  Especially when you've got no assigned topic or specialty.  For instance, Nick writes about publishing and tips to help out with that, Jesse writes about books he reads and Tanya writes about her deep thoughts.  But I want to keep this blog open to writing about whatever the heck I want to.  That's right... I can write whatever I want!  This is what I say to the 'authority figure' I have in my head that has told me that 'I can't do what I want!'
(My first grade teacher used to yell at me for stretching my feet out and making her trip, treating me like I did it on purpose or something.  I mean, I was just a puny innocent 6 year old, give me a break!)
But then... well... the world is wide open.  Like sending an orphan African street kid to the grocery store with a ten dollars.  What do ya want kid?  Just pick something already!
There are several times during the day when I'm hit with something I want to write about.  But maybe I don't have my computer on me, and then the thoughts drift away.  Or I start to write something, something I've been thinking about and have it all in my brain, I just need to get it out there, and then I've overthought it too much and I can't write it all out because at that point I'm just completely exhausted of the subject and DON'T WANT TO THINK ABOUT IT ANYMORE.  (take that, "authority figure")
So today, I've considered writing about my irrational fear of snorkeling --  a fish will eat you, i just know it! -- even though I was living in Hawaii and everything was just absolutely gorgeous, I could NOT force myself to do it.  Even today, I've tried it in Florida, bought the gear and everything and sitting through Finding Nemo for the first time was incredibly stressful (imagine that!).  I really should just give up, I mean, why can't I just sit on the sand and read a book??

I've also considered writing about other fears, fears of rejection, even from -- no, especially from -- your closest friends.  I seem to be the most venerable with them, when I'm with most people I am really quite confident, but in dealing with the most cherished friends I become such a insecure pansy.  What's up with that???????

I've thought about writing about writing, or about my bestest character, Tristen, or about the frustrations of being heard in a world where no one ever shuts off their phone, or their computer, or their brain, AND YET, everyone is shouting at them and so they don't ever really hear anything because they're too busy with their eyes glossed over, trying to avoid giving in to the pressure of someone "selling" them something, and too much information is at their fingertips and they just don't see little old me waving my heart that I've ripped out and served on a platter and named, TRISTEN The Last Seeker for them.
But none of those things seemed to take.  and so right now I'm just wishing for the Great Blog Guru to come down and tell me what to write.
That's right, you heard it, I'm waiting for the "Authority Figure" to tell me what to do.
see?  i really have tried.

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